Who Needs Toenails Anyway!?!

In Early May Greg and I went with some friends to play miniature golf for a friend's birthday. The day was going splendid. We were about half way through when one of the balls went flying into a near by pool of water. Greg, being the hero of the day, went off into the water (in his flip flops) to save the ball. He came out triumphant, BUT with the wrong colored ball. So he went back to the pool of water with a big smile on his face, determined to get the correct ball. However, on the grass, next to the pool of water there was a post or rock or something very hard. He slipped and his big toe crashed into the post, his golf club hit him in the eye, and he landed on his butt. The next thing I know he is pulling his big toe nail all the way back asking "What am I suppose to do?" I almost fainted. Blood was oozing out in the shape of a big toe nail. He managed to clean it up with a couple of band-aids and dirty water in the mens bathroom. Then he finished the game of mini-golf. THEN he went out to dinner with the gang. FINALLY, at almost 8 pm, he decided he wanted to go to the Instant Care center down the road.

At the instant care center we were met with a doctor that didn't seem to know anything. She certainly didn't have very good social skills, and acted as if Greg should know what the best thing to do was. Once a decision was made as to whether the toe nail should stay or go she attempted the process of cutting an entire toe nail off. She started by stabbing a needle into the tip of his toe, wiggled it around, and claimed that she numbed it. Greg could beg to differ. I watched the whole thing, and almost threw up. Next she grabbed some plier like utensil and grabbed hold of the big nail, moved it around like it's nobody's business, then gave herself a little pep talk that we could all hear. She said, "I'm just gonna do it." Then with some scissors ripped into the nail and very NOT-gracefully cut the damn nail off to the very edge of the cuticle.

It was very dramatic, and painful. I still cringe just thinking about it. So you can imagine how I felt when this evening I saw Greg trip, barefooted, into our ottoman, ripping off a portion of the opposite foot's big toe nail. It wasn't nearly as bad, but it was bleeding a bit. I told Greg he needs to start wearing steel toed shoes at all times. I am serious.